As the oldest child out of six, most of the good qualities I possess are ignored. It's understandable. After all, they've already finished me off. I guess they realized early on that I wasn't going to earn them any recognition as superior parents. And why should I? I'm the oldest. My job title should read "most responsibilty and least benifits." I seriously get screwed. My younger sibling's birthdays come around? Let's make a big deal about it. Oh, sorry Amanda--I have no idea what you like, so I just got you a $50 gift certifacate. Have they ever thought of ASKING what I like?
Honestly, I'm bitter. I'm not a cheerleader, a swimmer, a taleneted trumpet player (or a lousy one for that matter), and I'm not a kindergardener. I have nothing to offer except the qualities that make me who I am today. I'm a junior in high school taking AP & honors classes. I like to learn. I have great friends. I have a great job. So basically, I have a great life and if you ask anyone who has taken the time to get to know me, I'm a great kid. So, I don't understand why my own mother is ashamed of me.
The only thing I can think of is that the eldest children are screwed from the beginning. We're like old toys. Everytime a new one comes along we get discarded. We're the experiments of their family life. "Maybe if we do this, she'll be a better kid. Oh--it didn't work. Too bad she's screwed up now. Let's move on to the next one & give her some candy."
The only thing that will get me through my junior and senior year is the knowledge that soon I can leave my screwed up family (I'll miss Les & my cats), go to college, make it big in advertising and then flash my money around during family reunions to my sisters(the drunken cheerleading coach and the wanna be proffesional divers), my brothers (a street musician, a business man charged with sexually harassing a secratary, and the other one) and my mom (an grossly overweight wanna be porn star). Bet they'll wish they had cared then. |
